And the week is done.  Though I only worked two of the days.  I went to work on Monday and Tuesday.  All day Tuesday, I steadily got sicker.  By Tuesday night I was a mess.  Couldn't breathe while laying down.  Etc.  I called in to work Wednesday.  Had a fever.  Congestestion.  Blah, blah, blah.  Was better Wednesday night.  Took Thursday and Friday as two additional recovery.  I figured my coworkers would appreciate me not spreading my germs all over the place. 

I did go to the doctor today though.  Not because of being sick but because of my knees and my tumble at the skating rink last Friday.  One of my knees doesn't seem to be healing right.  It's not causing me much pain, but it's still quite swollen and I've lost partial feeling in it.  The doctor decided that I don't need xrays as it's probably not broken.  But that I suffered some nerve damage.  And there's nothing to be done about that.  It will either heal on it's own, or it won't.

I also have an appointment next Wednesday night to go to one of the local hospitals to have a CT scan done of my brain.  My doctor wants me to have it because of the recent increase in number and severity of my migraines.  And because of my sister's history with AVM.  I still say it's either stress or environmental.  But he's not taking the chance that a medical reason gets missed.  I like my doctor.  He actually listens to me. 

My sister is the unlucky one.  She has no medical insurance, so every time she went to the doctor for symptoms that should have led to further testing, they didn't do anything.  They thought she was faking numbness in her legs and arms.  That her claiming to fall a lot were lies.  Yes, my sister is a drug addict.  She went to rehab and has been clean for about 5 years.  But come on.  Just because someone is a recovering addict and has no insurance, doesn't mean that every time they go to a doctor it's to get  narcotics.  My sister didn't use narcotics.  She did crack, cocaine, weed and other illegal drugs.  Not pharmecueticals.  Because of doctors who wouldn't listen, my sister almost lost the use of her legs and her vision.  And was within a couple days of having a life threatening stroke.  But on a good note, her level of physical activity and fitness contributed to a near total recovery.  Her balance is not the greatest.  But she is back to coaching gymnastics.  With the help of medication, she hasn't had a seizure in almost a year.  She is back to playing the piano beautifully.  And her memory is almost back to what it was prior to the strokes. 

Cinco de Mayo is tomorrow.  Grace made a pinata to take to school today.  She did a great job considering that I'm a real dummy.  I forgot to have her wrap the balloon before paper maching.  So, if we were to pop the balloon to make it a working pinata, the paper mache would collapse in on itself during the pop.  So it just looks pretty.  We did buy some candy for her to pass to the kids in her class anyway.  If the class wants a working pinata, Ari is bringing a real, store bought one.  Ari is a girl in Grace's class.  And she's in Grace's ballet class.  Ari told her mom that she needed to bring a pinata.  What the truth of it is...  the kids needed to make a project for Cinco de Mayo.  So poor Ari's mom.  She went and spent $15 on a pinata.  I'm sure it looks beautiful.

I am waiting, waiting, waiting on my movie hold at the library.  I'm waiting on Game of Thrones season 1.  I've been on the list since early March.  There are five copies district wide.  And I was only number 60 something when I got on the list.  I should have it by now.  I don't have HBO, so this is the only way I can see it.  I have a bunch of movies I want to see, but I want this one first.

I don't really have much else to say.  So, I'll leave it at this.  Have a great weekend.

Lazy Sunday.  I'm not intentionally being lazy.  I am doing laundry, making supper, and i would love to get my kitchen clean.  But we have a paper mache pinata in the works.  So my table is strewn with newspaper strips and a really disgusting balloon wrapped with still wet starch/flour soaked newspaper strips.  Once it dries a little more, we wll mix up another batch of starch/flour stuff and Grace can continue to paper mache.  She's making a pinata for Cinco de Mayo for a school project.  I think it will be really nice when it's finished.  After she's done paper mache-ing the balloon and it's all dry. We are going to release the air from the balloon and cut a small hole in one end.  The hole will be for putting the candy.  Then she's going to use a pencil eraser to stick little squares of tissue all over the balloon to make a colorful design.  You might remember using tissue paper and pencil erasers for art projects when you were a kid.  But my table has become the art zone for the past couple of days.  Oh and by the way, liquid starch is not easy to find.  I probably called 10 stores looking for it until we found the Alpine Walmart had it.  The Walmart closer to me didn't have it.  So we made it a field day to go on Alpine yesterday.  I hate Alpine.  It's insane.  People are idiots and don't know how to drive.  Plus the light cycles are stupid.  I sat at the light to turn into Walmart  for four light cycles and I was only about 10 cars back.  Since we were making a field day of Alpine, we decided to stop for lunch up that way.  There are restaurants there that are not on my end of town, and since I hate driving Alpine, we hardly ever go.  There is a hibachi japanese buffet place that we like.  So went there.  I made up a plate of raw beef, mushrooms, sprouts, green bean, shrimp, crab meat, and garlic sauce.  They cooked it up and it was so good.  Grace isn't very adventurous.  She selected raw beef and teriyaki sauce for them to cook up.  And it's got all the normal asian buffet selections.  So I also had rangoons, egg drop soup, baked flounder and a bowl of pecan caramel, strawberry twist icecream.  Grace had... other stuff... and icecream.   I can't remember the other stuff. 

I'm inventing tonight for supper.  I have a package of thick cut boneless pork chops.  I've got them thawing.  I'm only going to let them thaw part way, then slice them into strips.  The reason for letting them thaw part way is because raw meat is so much easier to cut than completely thawed meat.  I'm going to saute them in olive oil.  Once they are cooked completely, I'm going to add some seasoning for flavor and add some chopped veggies.  Don't know which yet.  I have to go to the store and pick them out.  Once they are all cooked up, load them up in four torillas and enjoy.  Call it a taco.  Call it a fajita.  It has no name, since I'm the creator, and will do with it what I want.  With cooking, I'm a creator.  Not a recipe follower.  Except for baking.  The only way I can make a cake or make cookies is if I follow the recipe to the letter and even then it sometimes doesn't turn out.  But with meat dishes?  I do reasonable well with creating.  Some of my concoctions turn out good enough that they become regulars in my meal choices.  I invented a poor mans beef stroganoff completely by accident.  And it is really good.  My invented meat loaf is one of the best I've ever eaten.  My spaghetti sauce is pretty good too.  Chili, pot roast, beef stew are all good too.  One thing you can't be, in my household, is a vegetarian.  Beef and pork are a staple.  Chicken is ok.  But beef and pork make up the core of my meat choices.  And bacon?  Don't get me started on bacon.  Bacon is like candy.

We watched Where the Red Fern Grows this morning.  It's old.  Very cheesy music and the picture was horrible.  But it was a good story.  Having never read the book, I had no idea what the story is about.  Grace is reading it for Literature in school.  But they haven't finished it yet.  I sobbed at the end.  For about 10 minutes.  It was heartaching to watch the boy and know the pain he was feeling.  Yes, I am a cryer.  Bridge to Terabithia is one that make me cry the most.  Heck, I don't even have to be watching it, only listening to it from another room and I cry.  And don't laugh at me... I cried watching a Folgers commercial on tv once.  Anyway, with the movie this morning, Grace looks over at me and comments "You're crying."  I tell her "Yes, and why aren't you?"  She replied with "I did."  Okay, so I am more emotional than her.

Yesterday evening was the first night for rehearsals for the ballet production.  They've been working on the dances for a couple of months already, but the rehearsals are for bringing all the different ballet classes together for a seamless production.  They have two more rehearsals at the dance studio, then a rehearsal on the stage where they will be performing.  The night after that will be dress rehearsal for the entire recital.  So that night, the ballet production will rehearse twice.  Grace will be in both shows for the recital, so Friday and Saturday will be long ones.  Friday is dress rehearsal and she has to be there from 5:00 until both shows have gone through.  And that Saturday, is the recital.  First show is at 1:00.  Second show is at 6:00.  The ballet production is in both shows and her tap/jazz is in the second show.  Friday and Saturday will be fast food days.  Most of the kids get KFC if they are in both shows, since it's right down the street.  My mom is coming for the recital and is happy that Grace's tap/jazz is in the second show because she wants to take Grace out to dinner afterwards.  It will be a long long day.  And disappointing is that the photographer won't be taking individual pictures this year.  He will only be doing group shots.  I don't want a group shot.  I want individual shots.  And my photography skills are not very good.  So, I deal with it.  I'll take individual pictures and just hope they turn out pretty good. 

But time to get out of here.  I have to go to the store and get some veggies.  But I want to wait til Grace gets back.  She went over to the tennis courts to play.  Ah, I see her, riding her bike back home.  See you next time.

Went skating on Friday night.  Trying out my roller blades for the first time.  I got them at a thrift store for 5 dollars.  They work great.  The wheels roll smoothly and they are comfortable.  Things were going well.  I was figuring out how to skate in blades and was actually doing okay.  Toward the end of the night, Grace and I are skating hand in hand.  We lose our balance and we go down.  I made sure that as I was falling, I was falling away from her.  And it was all good.  Neither of us was hurt in the least and were actually laughing about it.  My friend helped me up and I discovered that I had lost my skating legs and needed to get off the skating floor.  I only have about 6 feet to get to the edge of the floor, but as I said I lost my skating legs and absolutely could NOT keep my balance for anything.  I went down again and went down hard.  I landed belly to the floor.  My knees took the brunt of it, with my hands blocking my face from hitting the floor.  Both knees are incredibly bruised.  The left knee is much worse.  I had an egg sized contusion for a day, then swelling.  My right knee is moderately bruised and swollen.  The knees themselves are both fine.  What hurts are the bruises.  And wierdly enough, my hands are bruised too.  I don't think I've ever had a bruise on the inside of my hand.  The outside, yes.  But not the inside.  Anyway, I will skate again, but I'm going to wait until the bruises are healed.  I really don't want to fall on my knees again until the bruises are gone.  They hurt bad when any kind of pressure touches them.

I was slowly working my way through the Game of Thrones book series.  I read the first few.  And as I went along, the more more tedious it got.  So, I got my hold from the library of the newest one.  I kept the sucker for six weeks, and I don't think I ever made it past page 200.  That is so bad for me.  I eventually gave up and returned it to the library.  Grace recently finished reading Hunger Games, so I picked it up and read it.  It's nice and light and fluffy.  Just the thing I needed after plodding through Dance With Dragons.  Anyway, Hunger Games actually is pretty good story.  Written in a way that most preteens can understand.  Grace loved it.  And even read when it isn't bedtime.  That impressed me.  She finally found a book that captures her interest and doesn't have pictures.  I very willingly bought her book #2, instead of making her wait for a copy at the library to get to her with a holds list that was over 100 names long.  I got her copy at Barnes and Noble.  Then yesterday, I was at amazon looking at getting her the 3rd book, and got it for $9 and some change.  Now, I might start a Dean Koontz book that I was given.

I'm sitting here in my kitchen typing on this silly little laptop and I kept hearing motorcycles reving.  But I can't see the stupid things.  It's real close and not moving anywhere.  I hear the motorcycles finally moving closer.  And I see some nimrod on a motorcycle, learning to ride, and not wearing a helmet.  If an experienced rider wants to risk their lives riding without a helmet, then fine.  But oh my gosh!  Learning to ride should always require a helmet.  And new riders, by law, are required to wear helmets anyway.  I was driving down 28th, earlier this week, and had the pleasant experience to be nearly surrounded by motorcyclists.  Each and every one was wearing a helmet.  And they looked like experienced riders.  I wanted, until two weeks ago, to get my motorcycle endorsement on my license.  But now, I don't think I will.

Did I mention that Grace treated me to a movie for my birthday a couple of months ago?  It was really sweet.  Though, originally, it's not what she wanted for me.  It was funny though.  She kept bugging me about what I wanted for my birthday.  And she put a condition on it.  It had to be something I wanted.  Not something I needed.  Because for Crhistmas she gave me what I needed.  Socks and a new belt.  And she wanted this gift to be something I wanted.  I thought, and thought, and thought about it.  But I could never come up with anything I wanted.  I don't want any knick knack things.  I think she was hoping that I would pick out a dvd.  She kept hinting about me possible wanting another Buddies movie, like the Halloween one.  When I told her that I wanted her to treat me to a movie of my choice, she got angry.  And I finally got sick of her pissyness, that I just told her that she asked what I wanted, and I told her the movie treat.  I didn't want anything that would sit on my shelf.  I didn't want a kid's movie.  I wanted to see a movie that was geared toward adults.  Specifically, One For The Money.  I read the entire series to date.  I waited til it got to the cheap theatre so that Grace wouldn't have to spend so much on the tickets.  And you know what?  She loved it.  She asked if she could read the book.  And I can't remember.  I think there isn't any sex in this book.  I'll have to re-read it to make sure, before Grace gets her hands on it.

It's getting late and I'm tired.  Sad it is for someone so young to enjoy going to bed early.  And yes.  41 is young.  Don't laugh at me.  It's the truth.

It's been a long time...  I'm not very good at posting here.  Or anywhere for that matter.  Keep in mind, that I routinely come here and read what others have written.  So I'm not ignoring you.  I just don't comment very much.  Sorry, about that.  I'll try to do better.  With commenting.

Right now it's Spring Break.  Grace is at her grandma and poppy's til Saturday.  She called yesterday crying because she wants to come home.  It made me feel really bad that I couldn't pick her up.  I spent the day at home yesterday with a migraine.  You know the kind.  Where bright light or the color white would send sparks and needles running through my head.  That only lasts for a few hours, but after that my brain shuts down and nothing helps with staying awake.  So when she called, I was in recovery and still had a moderate headache.  And with a 4 hour round trip drive with cars headlights constantly flashing, I knew I wouldn't be able to tolerate it.

Regarding the migraine, I finally decided to talk to my doctor about them.  Only when I called, he didn't have any availability yesterday or today.  So today, I'm going to go to the med center and hope that they'll give me a prescription for something to tide me over until I can get in to see my doctor.  These migraines are coming at least once a week.  And I'm taking way too much sick time.  I think they are work related.  I'm not sure if it's stress or environmental factors.  My lead worker will occassionally comment that she always feels great at home but when she gets to work, she feels like crap.  Again, is it stress or environmental factors.  Don't know.

I've met someone.  Let me rephrase that.  I've been good friends with him for several years and recently started hanging out more.  I've known him as a single man, a married man, a new father, and now a single man with an almost 5 year old child.  I'm 41 years old.  I've dated since I was 17.  I spent nine years married.  And I can say that I have never known anyone like him.  It scares the crap out of me.  We have our differences, but the differences are only on the surface.  It seems like for the things that matter, we are very compatible.  He appreciates me, the way that I am.  I know it's too soon to tell, but maybe I'm not destined to be alone forever.  That I just never found the man that I am meant to be with.  And that's what scares me.  Since my divorce, my dealings with men made me think that all men are stupid and that I just don't like any for anything other than friendship.  But with him, I want more.  Maybe it's the fact that we've been friends for years?  I don't think that's it.  I'm friends with other men and I don't want to change those relationships.  Just this one. 

Dance recital is just round the corner.  Grace will be doing three dances this year.  Tap, jazz, and ballet.  The ballet isn't a stand alone dance, it's part of a production.  The studio that she dances at does a ballet production just before intermission at the recital.  And the 1 hour ballet students are a part of it.  Last year it was Swan Lake.  This year it's Sleeping Beauty's wedding.  Grace's part is playing Sneezy of the seven dwarves.  Another really cool thing about this dance studio, is that they have a tap dance class for the moms.  And they perform in the recital.  I would consider joining next year if I had more money. 

Work is...  well... work.  I answer phones all day, everyday.  Some people don't think that is really working.  But let me tell you...  I would rather be out reading meters all day than sitting at my desk talking to people on the phone.  It is very mentally tiring.  Some of my coworkers are quite the characters.  There's Marilyn.  She's two months to retirement and has about 6 dogs and 5 horses.  She's lives in the city so she boards her horses.  She has way too many animals.  That's not me saying that.  That's finances.  If she can't buy food for herself, because she has to feed her dogs, then she has too many.  She's also giving up her house and moving back in with her mother because she financially can't manage.  There's Cathy.  She's my leadworker.  She's a 48 year old mother of a 5 year old.  She's a lot like me.  Only she's married.  Other than that, we are very similar, people drive us nuts.  Her husband works the night shift, 7 days a week.  Where he works, they have mandatory overtime and the only time he gets a night off is if they do a plant shutdown for a holiday.  I have a bunch of other coworkers.  But two for now, is good.

I won my arbitration.  They screwed up and now have to pay me over $5k.  I don't have a definative dollar amount yet. But like I said, it's over $5k.  I have it earmarked for some things.  I'm going to get Grace a new DS.  I'm considering a PlayStation 3 or a Wii.  And the rest will get socked away to pay for Grace's braces, when the time comes.  I took her to an orthodontist last year at the recommendation of our dentist.  The orthodontist determined that Grace isn't ready yet.  Thank goodness.  I didn't have the money to get started with that.  So, annually, Grace will see the orthodontist to determine readiness.  And these annual appointments to determine readiness don't cost anything.  The fees only start once the orthdontics start.  And I think I can trust this orthodontist.  My dentist uses them for his own kids.  He's got kids Grace's age and younger.  So if this orthodontist is good enough for his own kids, then they are probably very good.

Since i mentioned the PlayStation or Wii, I guess I can talk about video games.  We currently have the Nintendo game system.  You know, the one that is about 20 years old.  I even found a store that sells the games, game systems, and services them too.  Grace plays them a little bit, but mostly when the neighbor boy comes over.  He's very sweet.  He's 16 years old and is very well mannered.  But it's really sweet that he comes over and plays video games with Grace.  But Nintendo is so old.  The graphics suck to hell.  It's slow as hell.  And getting a particular game to play when you want it to, can be very iffy.  I would like something newer and cooler.  PS3 and Wii are both good systems.  Like I said, I'm considering it. 

But I have to get in the shower and get cleaned up.  I'm heading to the med center to hopefully get some meds to tide me over until I can get in to see my own doctor.  Til next time.  Hopefully, next time will be sooner than the last time.

Ready for Halloween.  Bought the candy.  Grace's costume is ready.  She's going as Hermoine Granger from Harry Potter.  She's already got plans to be Harry next year.  Fake spider webbing on the bush.  Grace wanted to dress Buddy, but I said no.  Poor dog doesn't need a costume.  He's cute enough as he is.  Besides, I'm not taking him.  He's extremely excitable and the activity on Halloween would make him more nuts than he usually is.  He's half boxer, so he's very high energy.

We went to the apple orchard place a little north of town yesterday with one of the girl scout mom's yesterday.  She brought two of her kids.  And a girl scout dad dropped off his daughter.  So the kids had a good time.  The three girl scouts and a younger brother who happens to be a cub scout.  The kids did the corn maze.  Took them an hour.  Horse drawn hayride, and a jumping pillow thing.  We ate donuts and had cider.  I got hot cider and it was so much better than the cold stuff. 

Grace's poppy had a heart attach last week.  He's doing okay.  He needs surgery but they can't risk the surgery right now.  Minimally he needs a triple bypass, possibly more.  The reason they can't risk surgery right now is because of his overall health.  He's recovering from the flu, is a heavy smoker, has emphazema, and is extremely under-weight.  I'm told that if his weight was higher, they would do the surgery in spite of the other health concerns.  But with his lack of weight he has no strength reserves.  So they sent him home to recover from the flu and get a little bit stronger.  Though the surgeon told him that if he smokes while at home, the surgeon will refuse to do the surgery.  I hope they sent him home with nicotine patches.

Grace's dad is still homeless.  But for the life of me, I can't figure out how he's still able to attract women.  As a self sufficient woman, I would never consider someone who can't take care of himself, as dateable material.  Grace hasn't had contact with her dad since April.  Before that, the visits were very few and far between.  It's to the point, that I'm considering asking her and the courts for a legal name change.  As in, legally changing her last name and my last name to my maiden name.  Last week I learned that if the non-custodial parent hasn't regularily seen or regularily paid support in two years then I can file a motion to change her name without his permission.  And he hasn't paid support, with the exception of jail bonding for four years.  And as far as seeing Grace, he's been better about seeing her than he is about paying.  But it's still very infrequent.  But I won't change my last name unless she decides that she wants to change her name too.  Her dad has another bench warrant right now for non support.  His license has been suspended again.  But he left the state, so the bench warrant does no good.  If he gets picked up in another state, they won't do anything about the warrants.  But he is so far in arrears that I could ask the attorney general's office to file a federal warrant.  I've downloaded a copy of the form.  So it's just a matter of answering the questions and submitting it.  I haven't done it yet because I am stupid.  I'm stupid because I still hope that he will do the right by his first daughter.  Speaking of daughters, he has two other daughters by his second wife.  And I've learned that when he's talking to new people that he never mentions Grace, only the two little ones.  Is he so embarrassed about his first child that he won't even talk about her.  She's a beautiful little girl with a great love for life. 

A new work week tomorrow.  And tomorrow is the last day of October.  That means that tomorrow is the last day of our current teams at work.  This past Thursday we drew our new team assignments for the month of November.  I'm still on counter but my team mate will be different.  And non-existent for the first week.  She had hand surgery a couple of weeks ago.  She comes back after another week, but will be slow on the upswing.  But I'll manage.  I always do.  I almost didn't manage Friday though.  You wouldn't believe the number of people who came in of Friday and just wanted to complain.  I am so not a customer service type of person.

Grace has had her ears pierced for about 1.5 years now.  She is just now learning how to put her own earrings in.  She has success with one ear every time.  But the other ear gives her trouble.  She just asked me how I can get that earring in so easily when she has such a hard time.  And the answer I gave her is "experience".  The more she tries, the better she'll get.  But she's still pleased with herself that she can do the one ear every time.

Time to go.  I have a book that needs reading.